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That’s the promise from Bumble, an 8-month-old app that’s adding a new algorithm to grade users on metrics like engagement and, well, whether they’re demanding to see you naked.

To earn a “VIBee” badge on Bumble, male and female users alike must establish a track record of having real conversations with other users, says Whitney Wolfe, Bumble’s founder and CEO.

“I personally can tell you that all my girlfriends — and many women I’ve spoken to — have this fear of being perceived as desperate or forward when they want to approach a man,” Wolfe said.

The first step is to be aware of common dating sites and apps (many of which are intended to look inconspicuous) so that if you stumble upon them on your spouse’s phone or web browser history, you’ll recognize them.

Bumble, which also uses Tinder’s swipe feature to browse profiles, is rather “a means to emulate real life,” in which people can’t hide behind user names to spam or harass others, Wolfe says.

Likewise, the women-first messaging rule seeks to address a backward social convention that Wolfe believes has only gotten worse with the advent of online dating and texting.

“Sorry it’s taken me so long.” I do it so often I can cut and paste the phrases into each email reply.

With all the instant technology at our disposal (text! The pressure for an immediate response has gotten out of hand. When I’m writing back to you, I’m not working on a lesson plan or a book chapter.